being the holiday season, i thought i'd do an essay on it, since i haven't put anything else here for a while and don't feel like looking stuff up:
christmas time and new year's, you could even include thanksgiving, since many people really start thinking about christmas right after thanksgiving. a time for family, a time for peace, a time to spread love and joy to others, since, you know, we can't do that all year long, there has to be a devoted time frame for it.

family and friends, the backbone of many people, and the time spent with them during the holidays. driving god knows how many hours, waiting forever at a bus or air terminal, just to spend usually a couple of days...bickering, arguing, getting on one another's very last nerve to the point where you sit and think "why did i come?" you spent countless hours fighting the people in your way at the mall, on the road, in the stores, to pick out the gift, the one you know they'll want and have to have, so it can be "oh"ed and "it's...nice"ed. the temper and anger you'll get wishing you didn't have to go out and shop, wishing you had started shopping earlier, wishing the people dead who beat you to the 4:00 am opening to get all the good prices on the one or two total numbers of a specific item they stock- the rest being full price, the road rage you'll have as you sit through traffic, fight through parking lots, flip people off, wave fists, curse, spat, maybe even really throw down in a target aisle- it's happened before, i'm sure. just to get them "the" gift.

and a time for peace, such a lovely time for peace, the people bum rush the malls at ridiculous hours, fight and nag over "the" toy for christmas this year. rant and rave and get nasty little faces like that bilbo dildo hobbit guy in the "lord of the rings" movie last year, you know that face, lodged somewhere in some hour of the movie where frodo heals up at the elves' crib and sees bilbo again since he left early in the movie, yea, that face, all the people get it, there's no getting around it. they'd as soon push you out of the way or knock you down and kick you before being peaceful.

and a time to spread love and joy. see paragraph above. sure, there are those moments when it seems quiet, seems peaceful, seems joyous, when the family gets along, you feel loved, you feel warm, or that last one could just be becausethe tree they cut down in october has finally had it and it starts to catch fire, like thousands of homes each year, or because you've blown a fuse from having too many lights plugged into one outlet, or because you've got too much crap on the roofs of your house to where it looks like a fake, gaudy las vegas on flintstones vitamins and egg nog (egg nog with rum). some houses could probably even be seen from space with all that crap. and it's some competition? how lame is that? "ooo, let's see how much more shit i can put up" when really, why would you want to? think about it, you just dumped several paychecks on gifts for everyone, charged your credit card countless times, and now you want to deface your house and run your electricity bill sky high...you know those credit cards advertised on tv, "no-interest till january '_ _ (fill in the blank) they do that cause you're gonna be in fucking debt from all the gifts, charges, bills, that they're going to get you with the bill collector. it's ridiculous. but i guess it's christmas cheer...right along with all that third paragraph.

then it moves to new year's, the time to think back and reflect...reflect on all the shit you've gone through, how it's not going to happen this year when you know good and well it will, reflect on your debt, reflect on positive things, and how you wish more happened. a time to make "new year's resolutions" that's got to be one of the best jokes i've ever heard. it's liek an attempt to forget the past year, to repress it, but all in vain. new year's, like thanksgiving, a time to look back on all you have and appreciate it, and appreciate all the things, good bad and awful you had to do to get them. mostly, i think new year's as one of the loneliest times of the year. you get caught up in yourself, in your "resolutions", in the fact that you have to have someone to kiss at the stroke of midnight and how your year will be for shit if you don't find someone in the next 5 minutes so you frantically search whatever party, bar, get together you're at to find that other kissless soul to make you complete. or your year will be for shit. how lonely is that? now, sure, there are the exceptions of lovers who spend the time together, friends who platonically hang out and have a good time, the families who watch prehistoric dick clark's "rockin' eve" together. and those who go to bed after the midnght stroke, maybe even before, maybe around 11:00, or even 10:30. cause it's all the same to them. another day. how lonely is that? fuck,new year's should be sponsored by prozac, fuck, even valium. but i'm against those drugs. maybe for some people.

the holiday season, such a wonderful time, when love is a diamond or james bond razor, when the spirit is commercial, and the salvation army has it's biggest drive all year. i wonder how much they do get. i think it's a great cause, and i dump money in if i have some, but why not all year, why just this time? this time when people are the most rushed, the most hurried, the most stressed, the meanest, the most awful...the kindest...the most joyous...why can't it be all year long. why just this time of year?...people will always be mean, they will always cut you off, but it seems more so this time of year, or maybe because it seems like the time of year to be nicer, kinder, so it's just amplified when really, it's not any more worse...

i know this is not much of an essay, it's not really structured that well, but, sometimes that's when they're the best, when it's just stream of consciousness, just coming out however it comes out. maybe i'm just too critical, maybe just too naive, maybe even too cynical. maybe i'm just lost. or maybe everyone else is, and i'm enlightnened...by what, i don't know, but maybe i am.

in any case, happy holidays.

today:

berlin: tacheles art center- visitors to the off-beat art center mistook a woman's suicide as an art performance. the night before, artists at the center learned of the woman's intentions on suicide, tried to talk her out of it, but the next day she jumped...and you can mistake that for an art performance?!? what the fuck? "oh, nice life-like depiction of internal organs, nice smearing of flesh and splattered blood, well done" fuck, people are that stupid...

a german priest, eckhard bieger, wants to get rid of the santa image coca-cola helped to create, the rosy-cheeked fat man in the red suit, he believes that image "commercializes" christmas. he passed out several thousand "anti-santa" bumper stickers, which read "this is a santa-free zone."my aim is to put st nicholas back at the center of attention rather than this santa claus figure, which is just an empty shell." "the children should be at the center of attention. we need to focus more on core values and less on commercialism." --- huh, wha? would you fucking decide who should be at the center of attention? bieger said he wanted to revive a tradition in which st nicholas went from house to house on the night of december 6 and put sweets into shoes of well-behaved children...so, basically, he wants the image to switch from santa claus to a hershey's st nick?

check it out

ah, so the time is upon us...the weather is getting colder (well here in north texas it'll get cold, then warm up to the 70s, then get go to the 30s and 40s, then go back up- that's why so many people get colds here), the leaves have turned, well, some, and yes...finals...such a glorious life those of us in college lead...i've actually cracked open a couple books, maybe it won't be that bad...right...

so thanksgiving past, went to lubbock by way of 380, heh, my mom was pulled over by the haskell county sheriff for going 75 when the speed limit at night is 65...yes, the person who tells me i'm speedy gonzales, the same person who hasn't be pulled over in 10 years, this person who listened to their son when he said "see if you can catch up to the car in front of us"...she just got a verbal warning...


in related news: fuck the crap ass texas town of jacksboro. fuck it up the ass. yes, you jacksboro backwoods hicks can fuck yourselves, well, they're not really backwoods country people, but they can still fuck themselves up their own asses. i ask you, since when did the police force change from protecting and serving to a revenue service. the jacksboro police force apparently has. they conviently set up a speed trap the sunday after thanksgiving...here's how it went: one squad car on a certain corner with the radar and 5 or so officers on foot around a slow curve next to a big dirt lot flagging cars down as they passed giving out tickets. well, i missed our turn, so i had to make the block and came back around and got back on 380, when i pulled onto 380 the first speed limit sign i saw said 45 and i saw the cop, so i wasn't going to go over 45...i was flagged down and directed to pull into a dirt lot..."sir, you were going 45 in a 30 zone" what the fuck?!? i didn't see a 30 sign, i made the block and skipped it, but whatever, this is cheap pulling people over on a high traffic area with the majority of the cars being pulled over travellers. so that was enough, but when he asked to see my license, he never asked for proof of insurance, and he never rab my plates, he stood behind my car with his back to my license plate, wrote the ticket and gave it to me...we could've been fucking convicts, the car could've been stolen and this dipshit didn't even go through proper procedure, what kind of fucking cop is he?!? gives a bad impression of what small town cops are like. fucking racket. i tell you i feel safe in jacksboro knowing that half the force is working a fucking speed trap... lame asses. fuck you jacksboro. you know, if i had been pulled over by a squad car for speeding on the highway or something, i wouldn't complain cause he caught me fair and square, but their little trap there, that's fucking ludicrous, unethical, and fucking ridiculous. i hope one of the cars that was stopped and plates or insurance wasn't checked was stolen or does something so that it will get back to those fucking dipshits...stay away from jacksboro, texas, if you have to pass through, don't stop, don't support their community or their businesses, let them rot in hell...i try not to use this as a diary or what not, but i had to let you know about this...

in completely related news:

things that are difficult to say when you're drunk:
indubitably
innovative
preliminary
proliferation
cinnamon
things that are very difficult to say when you're drunk:
specificity
british
constitution
passive-aggressive disorder
loquacious
transubstantiate
things that are downright impossible to say when you're drunk:
thanks, but i don't want to have sex
nope, no more booze for me
sorry, but you're not really my type
we should take a cab
oh, i just couldn't
no one wants to hear me sing!


i am currently trying to figure out the perpetuation of affirmative action...

jerry springer: the musical, or umm opera- britain's national theater gave the world premier of "jerry springer: the opera" and it's had such wide review that it's going into full scale production in london in april. among the "showstoppers": a diaper fetishist confessing all to his true love, a dance routine by the ku klux klan, and jesus launching into a swearing tirade against the devil...hmmm...


michael jackson is a weird fuck

tommy chong (cheech & chong) opened an art show which featured photos of graffiti art, photos of sandy beaches, carved wooden sculptures, and (big surprise here) hand carved wooden pipes and colorful water pipes (it was noted that nearly every piece could double as a bong) one viewer stated while viewing a piece that appeared to be a glob of melted water pipes "it's the metaphor that you smoke out of these to get melted." ooo, an einstein here. nevertheless, tommy chong is cool

and that's all i've got for today